This was supposed to just be a letter to myself, in private, but it felt so good to get my thoughts out on paper that I now want to share them. Just for that little extra bit of permanence, of accountability I guess. It’s rambling as all get out and flits painfully between first and second person, but nevertheless, it’s where I’m at.
There, I said it. I want abs.
That may be the weirdest thing to come out of my mouth so far this year. I have never been that guy, never really even thought about it before. Although I am reminded of that strange episode in Year 8 when a girl in my class asked to see my six-pack. Continue reading
Today I drank an energy drink for the first time. Never tried the stuff before, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Namely that I was about 36 hours into Coke withdrawal and falling asleep in my boots, so I figured I’d try a quick can of V to try to avoid nodding off at the wheel and crashing on the motorway. Continue reading
Today I haven’t had a Coke. Now I’ve gone days without Coca Cola before, usually under duress, but it never lasts too long. I’ve been a full-blown Coke addict for as long as I remember. And I mean that literally, I don’t know when it was exactly that I started drinking it every day, but it was a long time ago, and I can’t remember what it feels like to not crave the stuff constantly. Continue reading
Today I put cold tea bags on my face. Sadly that is not as absurd a sentence as it sounds. My eyes are red, itchy and swollen almost shut, which sadly isn’t an uncommon occurrence, so at this point I’ll try anything for some relief.
I’ve seriously had it up to here with my skin.
That was a song by Evanescence wasn’t it? “I’m going under (going under) / drowning in you (drowning in you)” …music video where she’s underwater…right? I’m not imagining it am I? I dunno, I can’t be sure today because this morning I went under anesthesia for the first time.
Today I went for a long walk. I finally put my car into the shop this morning for the necessary alterations, and I figured to hell with it…why not just walk home? Now this place is about a 15 minute drive from my house, putting this just on the cusp of feasibility. I’ve never walked home from anywhere near that far away before, so I gave it a go.