Day 223: I Want Abs

There, I said it. I want abs.

That may be the weirdest thing to come out of my mouth so far this year. I have never been that guy, never really even thought about it before. Although I am reminded of that strange episode in Year 8 when a girl in my class asked to see my six-pack. Being a precocious Coke addict even back then, I was already growing my pot belly and had absolutely no idea why she thought that I had abs. It did make me marvel at the powerful ideas suggested to people when one is a tomboy and plays a lot of sport. I have always looked like…me, but I guess I used to get out of class to play this sport and that sport, so clearly I must be super fit and smuggling a six-pack under my blazer. I wish! You know what…now I’m thinking that I should have milked that for all it was worth…

Where the hell was I? Oh yes…abs. I’ve always had this Coke belly, never really been in tip top shape, aesthetically or aerobically. Not by my standards of fitness anyway. I guess because I’ve never had to be. I struggle with the cardio involved with something like AFL, but generally speaking when it comes to sport I’ve always been able to get by with whatever modicum of talent I possess. (That should be on my tombstone…’Here lies Stace. She got by.’) I’ve never really wanted to be fit for my health either, I’m a ‘drink Coke, ask questions later’ kinda girl; in a childish way I’ve sort of prided myself on the fact that I can eat and drink whatever I want while weighing the exact same as I did when I left high school eight years ago. And good old vanity has always been a non-starter with me. This is…what I look like, for better or worse. Besides, I can do all the sit ups in the world and my face is still going to be…my face, you know? I’m still going to have my skin. I have bigger body-image fish to fry than how flat my stomach is.

Vanity seems to be having some sort of effect now, but to be honest I think it’s less about that and more about…not wanting to regret my whole life. I know that if I look back at my younger self when I’m older and think “I could have looked badass, but I couldn’t be bothered” I will regret it. I will never be younger than I am right now. I will never have a better chance to get as fit as I can be than I do right now. So I’m going to take advantage of the opportunity while I’m still young (and while I have so much free time during the day…) because again, I will regret it if I don’t. Life is too short, and I’m only going to be 25 once.

I’m using “abs” as shorthand, by the way. It would be fantastic to have them, don’t get me wrong, but in all honesty I have no idea how this will go, and I’d be more than happy if I end up with a flat stomach and feeling a lot fitter than I do now. That’s the real goal. Being able to get through footy training without wanting to keel over will feel just as good as rocking a bikini, I’m guessing.

So from now on I’m on a mission. No excuses – and believe me, I am a world renowned expert in excuses. Professionally ranked. Luckily I already gave up Coke (*gasp*) in July so my main problem diet-wise shouldn’t be a problem anymore. In fact, once I stop buying blocks of chocolate my diet won’t look too bad as it is. Most of it will be me getting off my ass, which I’ve never done before for any length of time (I try…and then I remember that I HATE RUNNING and oops, there’s my bed again). That will be the part I’ll struggle to stick with, actually working out on a regular basis. But whatevs. No excuses. If I’m not getting off my ass, feel free to kick it.

Now that I’ve had this latest life changing revelation, and articulated it, I plan on getting back to posting normally. Fitness updates will be sporadic at best (I hope…if I become one of those people who talks about nothing else, please shoot me. That’s not what this blog is for.) but in the process of doing this I’m sure I’ll be trying a lot of things I’ve never tried before: lift weights, join a gym, a new sport…whatever it may be. So a nice consequence of this, as with any time one decides to go out on a limb in life, is that it should lead me to many more Something News.


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